Top 10 Reasons to be a United Methodist…
10. You don’t know what a steering committee is, but you’ve always felt called to be part of one.
9. You can go from potluck to potluck and never actually prepare your own meals.
8. You’re thinking about opening your own UM franchise.
7. If you don’t like the preacher, just give it a few weeks.
6. When you die, your name will be memorialized on a clock, pew, or cooking utensil.
5. You got a C minus in “Tongues I & II.”
4. If somebody annoys you, you can just go to the United Methodist church across the street.
3. If you pretend you’re not sure about joining, someone will bribe you with cake.
2. You have a choice between the “Low Guilt” and “No Guilt” services.
And the number 1 reason to be a United Methodist...
1. Even though outrageous ideas are taken seriously, by the time they get through committee they’ll be forgotten.